Untitled till September


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Yesterday I felt your absence,

Right beside me, like a perilous drop

From which I edged away, fearing for life.

Emptiness overwhelmed, overthrew

What little sanity was left, as

Hip hop beats pelted all around

Like paralyzing darts at a

Sore, swollen heart.

Have you ever felt how lonely, how barren

These club beats make you feel?

Well, you know how this goes,

Every time I look at myself in the mirror I

Try so desperately to catch maybe

A glance of your smile in my own eyes, a splinter

Of a memory perhaps trapped within

From when I last held you.

Well, you know how this goes.

When feelings overflow I throw

Handfuls in the air and catch

What I can on paper, try and build

A bridge to you with words, but

Does that bring you closer? No, but I try.

And there I sat in a lonely cab homeward

Fingers itching, to ruffle your hair

Heart a wriggling mess, scratching itself in a frenzy

Mad with longing, just for a feel of you.

Yes, so your absence gives me words, bittersweet

On the tip of the tongue, but

I’d much rather have you instead.

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Desert


The sun

Mocks and teases, brings one to their knees

Licks the face with its fiery tongue

Burns, comforts,

Warmth.

Alone

Watched the essence of life evaporate

In the infernal, dreary fog of the mind.

Behind

The glazed eyes, the words, the smiles

There hides an emptiness that words cannot define.

The distance

Grows, familiarity fades

Hostility proves a truth that the mind abhorred

Tenderness fades in to the distance, the heart

Squeezes and releases, reminding oneself

That it is merely a muscle and can be squished

To a pulp in careless hands.

Waiting, patience

Liquefaction of the insides

And gradually,

Eyes

Dry up of tears

Blood rushes out.


Oozing thoughts


It rained tonight

And drizzled across my mind, a thousand thoughts

That hummed and buzzed, shattered

Like glass beads across a hardened skull, the noise

Numbed the brain, as the beads

Rubbed against each other, teeth chattered

I wondered, maybe

The rain is to blame, thunder rumbled

And protested that it was not so, I remained callous

Listless eyes wandered

Across a wooden ceiling, rested themselves

On a rotating fan, round and round it went

Until I grew dizzy, the thoughts

Were quiet now, so was

The rain, there was

No one who would listen, the rain realized

That it wails in vain, and I realized

That I was all alone. So

The thoughts grew quiet and I

Ceased the chatter, bid farewell

To an indifferent ear, my thoughts

Laughed and did more bead grinding, tinkling as they ground

While I

Patiently listened, words poured

The rain recommenced and this time

I listened. Because it needed to be heard.